Breathe, Breathe in the Air

It's odd, breaking in a new clone. The tattoos aren't quite in the same places. Small scars are missing. The rotation of the joints is slightly different as I walk. The flesh feels different on my ribs.

And I feel different. They say the pod mechanism captures the brain state, and presumably that includes emotions. I have however felt calmer. Less pained. Almost like a feedback loop has been interrupted, and my emotions allowed to settle.

I haven't heard from Cia or Amieta since the night Cia asked me to leave. Perhaps that's for the best.

CJ called me though. To see how I was after the podding. I was surprised. Confused. I thought she was upset with me over Cia. I still want to ask why. Why she needed to yell at me to leave. Not ask me. It hasn't been the right time yet.

Yesterday I dropped into the Shackled Amarr to find Carinelle and Isobel discussing babies. They asked me a few questions about Matariki and her child, but I think they wanted to know things they didn't want to ask me.

Sarrapis - Anuko - came in. I said hello, but she didn't want to talk to me, and seemed upset that I was there. So I left.

Today, with the new clone, I dropped in and Carinelle was there on her own. I talked a bit, and asked how Anuko was. Annoyed with me, she said. Anuko thought I had lead her on. Taken her on dates when I wasn't available.

For some reason it was important to me to convince Carinelle that I hadn't. That I had been honest. Truthful.

Carinelle tells me that Anuko has beaten her slaver to death and is upset that her toy has broken.

So many pod pilots seem barely functional outside of their pods. Broken. Related to the implants, or a representative sample of the people in the 'verse?

Maybe I'm just normal?