Ghosts of the past

More kills this week, interceptors this time, who engaged a blue battleship. They stuck around too long and couldn't get out in time once reinforcements arrived. Once I arrived.

Found a new bar in lowsec; The Silk Scarf. It's in a republic fleet station, so reasonably secure. The beer is cold, at least. It looks like a pilot bar, though it's been quiet recently. I guess with the front lines so many jumps away, most of their pilots are closer to Dal.

Nelle met me there, and we got to talking. Somehow the question of what makes you you came up. I jokingly told her my half-thought-out theory on how I might technically count as an ancestor spirit. Dead, but still hanging around to look out for Atamahara.

That theory would probably work better if I'd ever had children. Most people in my clan would have had at least one, and more usually three or four by my calendar age, but having been "dead" for about four years makes that less meaningful.

Nelle seemed quite put out. To be definite that she is still herself, not dead, not a simulcrum, not a technical ghost. She's still getting back into the swing of things. Back into the decisive ways of thought required of a combat pilot. We analysed her loss and she said that had she gone immediately for the attack she might have got away with it, but changing her mind half way through was the major mistake. It sounds like the sort of thing I might have done.

Before we could argue more significantly, a new EM pilot joined us. Saul Mendoza, from the Lutinari Syndicate. For a corp supposedly aiming to have a tribal focus, Saul is the second Amarrian they've hired. He's leapt into combat, and is apparently quite talented, but I've never talked to him in person before. Nelle asked him why he'd joined Electus Matari, and he proceeded to down several drinks and tell us his life story. At length.

He's a Khanid, and comes from a somewhat privileged background I think. He certainly seemed to have little awareness of the realities of life for people at the bottom. Apparently, he got into trouble with the Khanid or Imperial Navy, and rather than stay with his people and face his punishment, shot his way out and did a runner to the republic. He seemed to expect us to be impressed or grateful that he'd deigned to come and help us out.

He doesn't seem to realise that for some people he's a different kind of ghost. A representative of the hungry ghosts that eat people's souls. I think he'll need to walk softly for a long time before Matari forget that.

Nelle was much more charitable. "Maybe, now that he's told us his story, we'll be able to have a conversation with him next time?"